‘clean up after yourself’
"you have to change your view on life, for life to view you in a different light"
i never thought such truth could sprout from the aroma of whiskey sours and M.G.D.
her intoxicated stumble into a locked door, regurgitated this spew of wisdom.
"i am the key to unlock doors guarded by a slot designated for someone who is more of a card than me"
whatever that means?
it's hard to take someone seriously when you know they wake up in their own vomit weekly.
but somehow her words lined my weekdays with a silver lining,
tarnished by the chunks she left behind.
i combine her words with my woes to mix an intoxicating glass to quench my insecurities, and that's when she said,
"you’re such a pussy! stop being so sensitive! sometimes i say things so that you'll think about them and just shut up for a while!"
i couldn't help but to think that all of our deep philosophic conversations were just in an effort to shut me up and that's when i realized,
that it works.
i put too much stock in people’s words even when they contradict their actions.
i want to keep my faith in the honesty of the spoken word.
especially when it can be so beautiful,
poetic, inspiring,
conspiring to easily deceive my sensibilities
even though i am not naive to the deceptions conceived in a malicious mind.
i find truth of people in the lies they tell.
and it shocks me how some believe if they never cop to the truth that their misgivings will not police how others view them.
if you tell a lie so much that you end up truly believing it, that doesn't mean others will be fooled by your follies.
the only fool ends up being the one who acts as if others aren't intelligent enough to see through to the truth.
peeking around the mask they wear to only be noticed as worthless as the valueless words they throw up to be hurled aside.
regurgitated wisdom still reeks of the depth of the bile that clings to the deceit within the darkest untruths that some hold on to.
i need a bag to air out the sickness, and separate the waters of truth from the chunks of deception.
before someone else tries to get me to swallow it back down.
anastacio palomo
